Healing

STRUGGLE – why it isn’t about what you wanted, but what you got

I'm Anindita!

I am a certified Health Coach who wants to share her knowledge and experience to help empower, educate and inspire other women to take care of their health without guilt

hey there

Get My Free Gratitude Guide

I want it

Harnessing the power of coming back to our true home  in the here and now and 

TOp categories

Guiding and supporting you in your healing journey

Taking care of yourself is a necessity!
Here's how you can do this...

Becoming whole by aligning mind, body and spirit using a Functional Medicine lens

Reading Time: 3 minutes [et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”3.22″][et_pb_row _builder_version=”3.25″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.27.4″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat”]

 

The real problem

What is on your SHOULD list?

Have you ever thought about this?

I ask this question to my coaching clients all the time and it’s really interesting to see what is on the list. The way most women think about themselves do not really match the experience that they would like to have or the life that they would like to live. And a lot of this goes unnoticed and unacknowledged. Asking questions like this bring it to the forefront. Answers range from “I SHOULD do more for my family” and “I SHOULD eat a healthier diet” to “I SHOULD have had different results in my life and achieved my goals by this time“.

The issue is not with what is on the list, but whether it should be on our list in the first place. By writing down this list, for the first time, many of my clients actually take a good look at what is holding them back. This is because if we are not aware, many of the things that we have been focusing on in our life are based on other people’s opinions.

Unfortunately, it does not end here.

Anything you can’t control is teaching you how to let go

-Jackson Kiddard

 

All of us deal with challenges that come our way on a daily basis.

Many of these are simply the demands of everyday life. And whether we like it or not, many of these are due to factors which are beyond our control. Infact, much of what happens to us in life is beyond our control.

Despite our best intentions and efforts, things go wrong- relationships fail, our loved ones die, we develop health problems, financial issues crop up. No matter how much we try to avoid it, pain follows us everywhere. Pain is indeed an integral part of our human existence.

Pain usually comes from difficult emotions like anger, shame, loneliness, fear, despair, confusion; all of which are a natural part of the human response to our life experiences. It’s how we deal with it that determines the level of our suffering.

Struggling with anything to make it other than what it actually is, creates this suffering. This means that we need to understand and accept that what we do matters, but we are not really in charge. This is key to dealing with our struggles in a new and healthier way. Suffering results from struggling with what is beyond our control.

This means reaching a point where you can remind yourself

“This isn’t what I wanted, but it’s what I got”.

On the other hand, your power lies in this present moment. All your thoughts and beliefs over the years have led you to this present moment. And what is important is that what you are choosing to believe and do right now will create your future.

When we are struggling- whether it is when we suffer, fail or even feel inadequate, it is really hard to stay in the present moment. It is certainly much easier and sometimes even useful to avoid pain as a defense mechanism. However, if avoiding pain becomes a way of life, it can lead us into trouble.

In the blink of an eye we can go from thinking “I don’t like this feeling” to “I don’t want this feeling” to “I shouldn’t have this feeling” or even “Something is wrong with me for feeling this way.”

No matter how we are feeling, all of us have what is needed to deal with suffering from a position of strength if only we know how. The key is to be able to access your inner reserves and resources and be able to use them when required.

By learning how to strike a balance between avoiding and facing your difficulties, you will develop the wisdom of choosing the greatest long term benefits over short term pleasures.

By doing this you will learn to take responsibility for your own happiness. This will also enable you to withstand the suffering that you go through when you don’t get what you want, when you get what you don’t want and when you lose what you had.

And It all starts with getting to know yourself better!

In this week’s podcast episode I take you through a self reflection and journaling exercise that can help you to see yourself clearly- your values, passions, thoughts, beliefs and feelings.

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ fullwidth=”on” _builder_version=”4.5.1″ _module_preset=”default”][et_pb_fullwidth_code _builder_version=”4.5.1″ _module_preset=”default” link_option_url_new_window=”on”]
[/et_pb_fullwidth_code][/et_pb_section]

+ show Comments

- Hide Comments

add a comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Health Coach, author, blogger, podcaster, self care activist

Before you get any further....
Hi, I'm Anindita!

I am a Functional Medicine certified Health Coach working with women who are dealing with autoimmune and other related chronic conditions,
a podcaster and I am passionate about empowering, inspiring and educating women how to prioritise their self care and live their life with meaning and purpose

Learn more

FREE DOWNLOAD

Making time for what matter most

Learn how to get started on focusing on what is important to you in your life.
It starts by making the right choices on how you spend your time, getting your priorities right and knowing that you are worthy of taking out time for.

PAPER PLANE

A few of the most popular posts from over the years....

@PAPERPLANE

© Paper Plane 2020. All rights reserved. | Legal | Design by TONIC